Butt, really?

Okay, so I'm out of the hospital, right? Well, yeah, and things were mostly going back to normal. However, Friday night I noticed something about my pooh. It was realllllly red. Yes, I do look at my pooh. I'm not as grossed out by it as some folks are. I just figure--it's POOH.

Anyway, I'd been eating a lot of jello over the past week while I was in the hospital because it was cool and smooth and went down easily. However, while peering into my toilet it made it hard to tell if it was red coloring from the jello or blood in my pooh. Not wanting to be the only witness to this, I called in Ralph to take a look. He is, of course, not of the visually pooh-tolerant. He took a look at it and started saying how I should call the docs and see if they want me in. At that moment had been home for a total of 4 hours and was REALLY not interested in heading back.

Luckily, the doc on-call felt similarly. She said to lay off the jello for a bit and keep an eye on all additional pooh leaving me. If I still saw some stuff that looked like it could be that the next day, then to call her. Saturday about mid-day, I had poohed twice and both times seemed to have some coloring going on. So, in an effort to be better safe than sorry, they brought me in for blood work today (to make sure that I'm not losing blood counts) and a pooh sample. Can I just say that I have a stubborn asshole?! They took my blood work around 10am, but it took me almost 6 HOURS later until my bowels unclenched and gave me my ticket home. I hate that you can't just tell yourself, "Pooh now, please" and just do it.

Unfortunately this is only part of the pooh/butt confirmation. The icing on the cake will be tomorrow. I will receive my very first colonoscopy. I'm not entirely sure that it is necessary, but considering bleeding out the butt can come from GvH and/or the Prednisone, I understand that it's probably a good idea. In the meantime, there's a monstrous 4 liter container of enzyme liquid to be drunken and a whole lot of toilet sitting ahead of me tonight.